My name is Steve and I'm bisexual. I'm 19 and live in Maine. Every time I go to change this I can never think if anything clever to write
A band called “homosexualist malaise” comprised entirely of bisexuals and pansexuals, who’s with me?
I’ve got bass
Anonymous said: If it's okay, could you tell me any slurs used on bisexuals? I promise I'll never use them on anyone; I'm just wondering if there are any.
Obligatory warning for slurs y’all. Well first a disclaimer that the majority of these slurs/insults are aimed at bi women and not all of them are just restricted to bisexuals but are primarily aimed at them, they range from mildly annoying to goddamn awful:
bihet (though this is often used against bi women specifically)
breeder (alledgedly intented to be used on straight people yet almost excuslively used against bisexuals and other minorities, funny how that happens)
AC/DC (not the band, but the type of switch)
sexual dyslexic (points for added ableism)
Ones mainly aimed at bi women:
Of course bisexuals get all the other homophobic and lesbophobic slurs aimed at them too, and get their community labels used against them as if they are slurs such as “bi-curious”. These are all the ones I can think of atm, if anybody has more please add.
again usually aimed at bi women
not only you don’t believe my sexualtiy, you think I need to be in an altered state to actually express parts of it
also LUG (lesbian until graduation) and hasbian
Tbey’re are very often used at bi women who have been in relationships with women in the past and are currently in relationships with men. Because object (or orientation) permanence is not a thing, apparently.
Totally forgot about barsexual, I really hate that word because it is often accompanied by sex-shaming and is used to force bisexuals out of lgbt spaces by painting them as predatory and inconsistant.
Also BUG (bisexual until graduation) is used alongside LUG.
It’s seriously disconcerting the way over half of those are aimed specifically against bi women.
The other day I was sitting in a common room, and the only straight person in the room suddenly pipes up and says “wow. I feel like such a minority right now.” Everyone looks up at her confused because there wasn’t any conversations going on at the time, we were all just sitting there in comfortable silence.
She continued: “I’m the only normal one here, aren’t I?” The began pointing at everyone, “gay, gay, lesbian, lesbian, gay, experimenting, experimenting, lesbian, experimenting … I’m the only normal one.”
The three people who she called ‘experimenting’ were two openly bisexual girls, and one who had clearly told her in confidence, as they looked shocked and hurt that this girl had said that, and Noone else knew. One of the bi girls said “excuse me? We’re not experimenting. We know what we like, we just happen to like both.”
Straight girl then got offended and proclaimed that she was ‘only joking’ when she realized that she had effectively pissed off every single person in the room, told us to cam down and ‘learn to take a joke’, then continued on saying that bisexual isn’t even a ‘real’ sexuality, so we had no right to get offended. Especially not those in the group who were ‘proper gay’.
It’s people like this who make bisexuality seem like such a shameful thing, and make people not want to admit it. But it was good to see the queer community standing together and during her down!
queerspectres said: hey wonderful person I was talking with someone about how a popular theme lately seems to be this idea of seriously insulting your friends and SO's to show affection and how harmful that can actually really be and I would actually love to see this get discussed more I don't have many followers so I was hoping you could help me start a dialog about this as well as share your own opinon. sorry for bringing it to you but I can't think of any blogs that deal with the discussion of abuse.
No worries wonderful queerspectres, I’m happy to boost this so that we can start this important discussion. I’ll leave it at the top of the page for a while so more people can see it. I also suggest perhaps checking out rapeculturerealities and emotionalabuseawareness since I think they could be useful in talking about this, they might even have already started threads about this. Feel free to boost and add to this followers :)
I see a lot of young, immature teenage girls doing this on facebook (not saying all teenage girls are immature, but these ones are), and it’s almost always combined with homophobic/racist/misogynistic slurs. Things such as “hanging with my f*ggots” or “love this slut”. It really fucking irritates me, it’s a fad that I really hope dies out soon because it can actually be genuinely harmful.
I do think that the use of slurs is what bothers me the most though, because I’m sure some people are completely okay with their friends insulting them in an affectionate way, although I think it’s so, so important to know the person really well, because if someone did that to me I’d probably be really hurt.
I do insult my friends but only friends I know well who I have spent a lot of time with, learning their boundaries.
I don’t mind that affectionate insulting either, but this is the thing: I expect the same. I expect someone doing it to be able to hear ‘please, not today’ and accept it.
You need to be so careful with this if you don’t know this well, because you could seriously harm your friends.
I don’t really like the ‘friendly insult thing’ most of the time. Like, I don’t mind my friends calling me an asshole and the like in a loving way, but I’m a really sensitive/paranoid person. So if a friend mocks my looks (especially my weight) or makes a really specific insult it will cut deep and I will obsess about it forever
My family is full of playful insults like this, but if we ask for someone to NOT joke about something (like my sister not liking skinny jokes) we STOP. It’s something I try to apply to my friends as well. Not that I’ve really ended up calling my friends anything much worse than ‘freaking loser nerd’.
But yeah, the point is, no matter what you do, respect a person’s bounderies.
This is the way I am with friends. I always get to know a person, and I always try to steer clear of anything legitimately insulting. In theory, I’m actually a lot more insultable than my friends, so I take as much as I give. I always make it clear that my insults are never meant and come purely from a place of love and respect.